Moving on.

So I think pretty much all of you have received a weepy phone call from me about how unhappy I am here. Elaine and Jason are getting the brunt of it, and are handling it quite well (a sign of good friends). I've decided to leave the dreaded Boston. I've been sick physically and emotionally since I've got here, and I don't want to wait around and hope for it to get better. It's a waste of my time, money, and cell phone minutes :). I'm going home to reset myself, and attempt to take some control over my life. I thought that I had gotten over or through all of my "I have a disease" issues during senior year of college, but it turns out that I really haven't. I've been seriously depressed since I've been back here after Thanksgiving, which scares me, as I find it harder and harder to maintain my usual mix of joyful sarcasm. The best part is that I know what is wrong, so now I can start to fix it!

As for my graduate program, it's not what I hoped it to be. I was looking for something that would feed my passion for reaching out to others with similar disease issues. The program is not bad by any means, I just feel it's mediocre. I don't want to have a degree in "what's that?". I don't want to go into monstrous amounts of debt (almost $12,000 for next semester + living expenses) for something that I'm not feeling. It's not a good fit for me, and I'm glad I realized that early on.

Boston is a nice place to visit, but I don't want to live here. So now I'm working on tying up loose ends - getting someone to take over my lease for the apartment, getting my finances in order, etc. I just found out that I won't have to pay back my assistantship money from this quarter (well unless Tim f*s me over and says I didn't work). I'm going to talk to Tim (program director) today, and hope that he's not going to be too pissed at me.

When I get home I'll be looking for a job and applying to an MPH program at Ohio State that will start in September. Imagine, classes during the day, only a year and a qtr. to finish, cheaper living expenses! My goal for the rest of the time that I'm here is to enjoy my wonderful roommates, and try not to flip out too much (that's harder than it seems), and finish up my school work (also quite hard to do knowing I'm leaving!). Thanks to my lovely friends and family for all your support and time :). I'LL BE HOME SOON!!!!!!!!!!!